Tuesday, January 1, 2019

Looking forward.

2018 was very unexpected, and in many instances made me come out of my comfort zones. For a while I thought I really knew what I wanted for my life, but God has a funny way of reminding you that His plan is above anything. None the less His plan for my life is truly unfolding bit by bit and I am enjoying it, as much as its been hard and sometimes uncomfortable for me.

I was blessed many times in 2018, but of course like every year there was hardships and difficult situations that made me question myself, my faith, my life in all. Yet I used those hardships as a ladder to get to where I needed to reach.

2018 tested my patience more than any year in the past. And I thought I would have none at all left for 2019, but I am growing and with growth comes better response and empathy. It reminded me of how strong I am alone, but that I was not built to be and do things alone so I must allow people in, ask for help, and be grateful that I do not have to do it all alone. It reminded me that I deserve peace of mind, and sometimes treating myself is what is necessary for my very own sanity. In 2018 I re found my love for literature, writing, learning, and teaching. I am a creator in many aspects and when I am able to create I flourish and my confidence shows. I believe that 2018 for me was the year of re birth in so many ways. I was able to really come back to myself, and the person I knew before children. I was able to go out again, and enjoy myself without talking about my children the whole time. I was able to enjoy some drinks that turned into more drinks at another bar, and to a diner after for some late night food indulgences, and no mommy guilt at the end of the night to taunt me. I believe this to be a huge deal, and I know that I can find myself again fully in 2019, yet still be a kick ass mom at the same damn time. Who would have thought that was even possible huh?

I am ready for all that 2019 has in store for me, and I know that God has multiple blessings lined up for me in this new year. I know that I will still have my bad days, and my down days, and my tough days where I just wont know what to do or feel - but none the less my God has yet to fail me and pick me up out of those situations, better and stronger. So just like that I am taking on a new year with my boys.

Thank you to all of my family friends, and  loyal followers who have been down right amazing during this year of blogging. All the beautiful messages I get on the regular and the support I receive every time I post a new posting leaves me to believe that this is totally one of my callings. Connecting with moms from near and far, and just talking about our motherhood struggles and sharing situations that connect us and help us feel a little less alone. I love you all for showing me that what I am doing here on this platform is far more than just typing on a computer screen. This year I want to be more of an open book with you guys, and less sponsored post, less event coverages, but much MORE of the raw and un cut life of motherhood for me. I am looking into rebranding for the new year, a new name, a new look, and more writing from my heart and soul. I hope to continue to see you all during this new year, new chapter.

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